Sowing The Seeds Of For Success!
The need for positive input
I am currently reading the fantastic book "when you are falling , Dive " lessons in the art of living by Mark Matousek . A book of interviews with people who have faced or are facing some of lifes toughest challenges and how they deal with the emotional effects .
One of the chapters I have just read is an interview with Daniel Goleman , the man who wrote Emotional intelligence , and who is now doing a lot of work on what he has coined Social intelligence . What struck me in this , is the interaction between ones persons state of mind and anothers , how intrinsicly linked we are to another persons feelings at any one time.To the point , Goleman says that relationships with other people literally have the potential to affect not only the physiology of our brain , but our overall health .
In one study for example a wife nursing her husband who has alzheimers was shown to have her cell life diminishing at a greatly increased rate .
We are far more connected than we know and the human ability to empathise thus far more powerful on our own well being than maybe we realise .
A key application of this occurs in what Matousek calls Toxic relationships . People that bring us down constantly rather than up , who take more than give emotionally .
Now for many of us when life is so called " normal " we can handle a few relationships like this , so long obviously that we have other friends to build us up in return . Howehver one of the classic things I hear clients say going through Infertility is that their reserves feel so low , and that they have little else to give .
I often use the analogy of a glass filled right up to the top , to the point that simply adding one more drop will cause the lot to spill . Infertility so often fills our glass right up to the brim , and we find there is little room left for much else .
Being aware that your reserves are low is a good starting point , and then making sure that the relationships we have with those around us are , as far as possible helathy and balnced ones . ones that wont be adding those extra drops into the glass .
purposefully filling our lives with people , situations and events that will nourish us is so important when facing Infertility . Not a selfish act rather a survival technique .
Today I hope you find those things and people that will bring life , hope , fun and warmth into your situation , and that the reserves feel a little higher than before .
One of the chapters I have just read is an interview with Daniel Goleman , the man who wrote Emotional intelligence , and who is now doing a lot of work on what he has coined Social intelligence . What struck me in this , is the interaction between ones persons state of mind and anothers , how intrinsicly linked we are to another persons feelings at any one time.To the point , Goleman says that relationships with other people literally have the potential to affect not only the physiology of our brain , but our overall health .
In one study for example a wife nursing her husband who has alzheimers was shown to have her cell life diminishing at a greatly increased rate .
We are far more connected than we know and the human ability to empathise thus far more powerful on our own well being than maybe we realise .
A key application of this occurs in what Matousek calls Toxic relationships . People that bring us down constantly rather than up , who take more than give emotionally .
Now for many of us when life is so called " normal " we can handle a few relationships like this , so long obviously that we have other friends to build us up in return . Howehver one of the classic things I hear clients say going through Infertility is that their reserves feel so low , and that they have little else to give .
I often use the analogy of a glass filled right up to the top , to the point that simply adding one more drop will cause the lot to spill . Infertility so often fills our glass right up to the brim , and we find there is little room left for much else .
Being aware that your reserves are low is a good starting point , and then making sure that the relationships we have with those around us are , as far as possible helathy and balnced ones . ones that wont be adding those extra drops into the glass .
purposefully filling our lives with people , situations and events that will nourish us is so important when facing Infertility . Not a selfish act rather a survival technique .
Today I hope you find those things and people that will bring life , hope , fun and warmth into your situation , and that the reserves feel a little higher than before .
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